The unintentional client fondle and what to do about it

We’re all well aware of what is appropriate physical conduct with others and what isn’t – we’re in the post #metoo period and it’s okay to speak out about issues of conduct and consent.

Yet, there is another veterinary great unspoken #metoo problem: the unintentional client fondle (UCF).

Vets, vet nurses, male, female – none of us are immune to that moment where you’re restraining a patient and the owner is “helping”, and somehow end up accidentally stroking your arm, bum or boobs.

How does this happen?

For non-veterinary readers of this post it might seem a weird thing to happen; how can people not know who or what they are repeatedly, affectionately touching?

Let me explain: it is usually in the heat of the moment as we all try to ensure we can bandage or blood sample a patient that doesn’t want to have these things done. But where do we draw the line?

I know uniforms can get a bit hairy, but I don’t think I’m ever quite as hirsute as the patient, so surely they know they aren’t stroking their pet?

A different space and time dimension?

It probably helps to establish that the consult room – where most of these incidents happen – is always a bit of an odd place for boundaries.

It’s not quite the TARDIS, but the private 1-2-1 nature of consultations can reduce or increase boundaries between clients and staff. This doesn’t usually involve physical contact, but I feel many clients go into “stroking overdrive” to calm their and their pet’s fears during consultations or while getting treatment procedures.

This is rarely beneficial, but I think it explains why people aren’t really aware they are stroking a person and not their pet, and that the anatomy they are stroking shouldn’t be stroked.

Clients pawing at their patients often doesn’t reduce the patient’s stress or improve our ability to do our job and can result in the client being bitten. On all levels it’s not that helpful, so what can you do?

How to prevent it

• Have clear boundaries before you start about how much “help” you need. Some patients are better with the client helping handle, but, in my experience, this is the minority of patients.
• Discuss what is needed before you start working with the patient, and explain words you will use if you need the client to move or stop. I’ve seen people saying “clear” or “finished”, and the client doesn’t know what that means.
• In cases where the client isn’t needed to help you can explain who will hold the pet and how before you start working with the pet. Sometimes the positions that pets are in to facilitate jugular samples or nail clips can seem very dramatic to a non-vet, so the owner rushes to help when they aren’t needed.
• There is also the option for the client to wait outside while you do the procedure – or you can take the pet to another room. This can be worked out if planned in advance.
• If already invoiced, the client can pay the bill while they wait.

There are behavioural benefits to carrying out procedures away from the consult room. A clinical exam aided by treats is a positive experience for most pets and is associated with the space it is carried out in, but if that positive experience ends with taking a blood sample or a fractious nail clip, we know they are likely to be more anxious about entering the same room at the next visit.

A few small changes

Could we reduce patient anxiety and improve staff well-being by creating boundaries with patients and clients – and also with where we carry out certain procedures – where possible?

One health means using our skills to promote patient and people welfare, and maybe this is one area not yet fully explored.

We all need some boundaries for happy healthy lives, so could a plan to prevent the UCF help on many different fronts?