1 Nov 2018
Ami Sawran describes her early career as a vet and why it took six years for her to actually start enjoying her job.
Image © Thunderstock / Adobe Stock
I’m Ami, and I’m a farm vet. I first wrote for Veterinary Times as a new graduate – wide eyed and enthusiastic, with a hint of terror that comes from not quite feeling ready to fly the nest. I’ve been a vet for seven years now, and it’s taken about six of those for me to actually enjoy it.
Somehow, I don’t think I’m the only one who struggled to get to grips with this all-consuming vocation – and that’s not just down to some entitled millennial unrest.
I graduated in 2011, straight into an internship I applied for because I wasn’t ready to leave the comforting confines of university life. Hoping this would give me a gentle grounding in my new career, I instead found myself in a limbo between first opinion practitioner, student taxi service and professional getter-in-the-way in a referral hospital.
Thankfully, the internship no longer exists in this form; it’s evolved into a much more structured job. I feel strongly (at least where I work) that new graduate programmes are developed with pastoral care, stress reduction and retention in mind, and am happy vets can look forward to a supportive first year in practice.
After my internship, I didn’t feel equipped enough to be “useful” to anywhere in grown-up practice, and opted to do research with a view to a PhD.
Let’s preface this by saying I did not sail through my veterinary degree, so why I decided to put myself through one of the toughest academic challenges universities can muster, I genuinely have no idea.
Maybe I thought it would make me good at something. Maybe I was avoiding the front lines by learning statistics. I don’t know, but it didn’t suit me; three years of battling full-time impostor syndrome saw me come out the other end with heaps of corrections and a diagnosis of chronic fatigue syndrome.
Was now the right time to get a full-time job in practice? Probably not, but I had rent to pay and a willing employer.
I’ve worked in a few posts in different areas, but none have suited me as much as my current one – and there are a few reasons why:
I was lucky to have few attachments to specific areas; while I would love to be closer to my family, I chose a practice based on the team, and where I thought I would fit in. No regrets on my part, and they’ve yet to change the locks.
I love an opportunity to get my grubby hands on more letters or certificates.
Luckily, I have an employer who does not see CPD as an excuse for a day out of the office. After years of being terrified to ask for funding to do what I wanted, I finally figured the worst someone could say was no.
I made it clear I needed reduced hours on account of my fatigue. I still do full OOH, but my day off each week provides essential recovery time – and that makes me more focused and enthusiastic about work when I’m there.
Now, I’m more about where my next challenge is coming from, rather than my next nap.
I’m into different things. I firmly believe nobody talented enough to get into vet school suddenly becomes “just” a vet on graduation.
I’m interested in marketing, education, knowledge transfer and social media, so offered help in those areas – they took me up on it; I feel useful beyond the realms of an occasional animal fixer. Result.
Of course, this is not an exhaustive list of everything one must do to achieve perfect balance, but I can’t have been the only person crippled by anxiety over asking for the most basic of considerations.
I hope even making one small change could help vets stay in the profession long enough to actually start enjoying it for what it is – something that makes you much more interesting at dinner parties.